Local Spiritsmith Conjures up Mayhem

Spiritsmith Briley McPendlebritches summons Father Christmas unexpectedly from his slumber

Traveling spiritsmiths are usually of little concern to the residents of New Peebleshire, but one in particular has caused quite a stir as of late. Briley McPendlebritches has long been known for his dastardly wizardry, which has now found its way to the cobblestone streets of our fair village. His conuring of disgruntled spirits has disrupted seemingly everything in town, from bootblack guild beet cook-offs to playwrite Fritz McJulip's latest production, "Poppycock!"

With little hope of running McPendlebritches out of town peacefully, the commoners may be forced to resort to a town-wide booting (a practice which involves all residents wearing a boot on their dominant leg whilst leaving the other foot bare. The residents then give chase to the object of the booting, who, if caught, suffers no less than 140 kicks to the midsection). Such drastic measures have not been taken since 1611, when a suspected witch was caught tampering with the sorghum mill.

Needless to say, there must be found a resolution soon, lest the drunken spirit of Father Christmas show his face again.

A devout follower of McPendlebritches, wearing the signature hat and cape of all his apprentices.